Busted by G.F.

[Random Letters]

I posted this in another forum when the below happened to me a while ago. I figured I'd post it here, as some may find it helpful in their current situations...

A few of you may know that I have held the stance of "don't ask don't tell" when it has come to telling my GF of 6 years about my use. I have been discreet and careful, and never had an issue until today.

I got a call at work and she was on the line and the first words out of her mouth were "is there something I should know?". I nearly shit myself. Of course, your mind immediately flies through all of the possible things that it may be and you don't want to jump to any conclusions...you know, maybe she found your porn stash, or hell, maybe you just left the toilet seat up and she's pissed because she fell in. No point in incriminating yourself immediately, so I played dumb (not really a stretch apparently).

It turned out that she had found my ancillaries, which I never concealed well enough. She found two bottles of Exemestane, a bottle of Finasteride and 2 bottles of bacteriostatic water. Of course, once caught in a lie, you really have no choice but to either continue to lie or come completely clean. So I continued to lie. I did as well as I could from my work phone, assured her that it was all on the up and up and let her go.

An hour later she called back crying and said "is there anything else you want to tell me?" So now I figured she found the gear and that I was screwed, but of course I continued to tread water and found out that she had found $1k in cash that I had set aside for hGH after the Olympics and a syringe wrapper that I must have forgotten or dropped somewhere. In a word, I was cooked. She couldn't prove anything yet, but she KNEW.

I left work and headed home to face the music and try to salvage my relationship. We talked for a long time and I told her about my use. As expected, she kind of freaked out, but not as bad as I thought she would. She was mostly hurt that I didn't tell her, and is concerned that what I am doing could be hurting my health. I assured her that I am being as responsible as possible and get regular check ups, monitor BP and that I don't abuse the drugs that I take.

It sucked. I was committed to the lie that I actively decided to tell by not letting her know what I was doing from the beginning. That lie grew into more and bigger lies as all of the elements came together. Instead of just lying about using, without realising it I was lying about and/or hiding ancillaries, money, pins, deliveries...it's kind of like the children's story about the lie that grew and grew.

Anyhow, so far as I can tell everything is alright. She is disappointed, and she feels like I have damaged the trust that we share and she is absolutely right. I feel terrible that I lied and then continued to lie to her. She means the world to me and I should have just been a man and told her from the beginning, but I'm stubborn and didn't want to deal with what that would have entailed, nor did I want to deal with the potential consequences.

There is no moral to the story. I can't tell anyone to share their use with their significant other as I don't know their personal situations, but I CAN say that in hindsight, I should have told mine. Anyone who finds themselves in the same situation should think long and hard before committing to a lie that may have to live for a long time.

[Random Letters]

*update*

So after 24 hours to clear her head and to think about the situation, she called me yesterday and told me that she wants to talk more about it. As I suspected, I had gotten off a little too easy. A few tears and a bit of a scolding was much less than I anticipated, and obviously not my entire punishment.

My G.F is one of the people that always do their best to be a good person and to obey the law. It took me nearly two months to convince her that an FTA satellite box was a good idea, and even then she had reservations. She is also one to take pharmaceuticals very seriously, and the fact that I am essentially self medicating is what is most upsetting to her.

Anyhow, she basically told me that she loves me, but she doesn't think she can handle what I'm doing. She thinks that the dangers far outweigh the benefits and to purchase drugs online and then to use them is the height of irresponsibility. I heard all of the typical lines that you expect to hear in these situations like "I don't even know you anymore" and "what would your family say?".

I talked about the relative safety of the drugs I choose to use and gave her my reasons for choosing to use them. I explained that if she hadn't found my stash then she would not have called me out on "changing" or "not being the same person" and that her perspective is skewed due to the media and her lack of knowledge on the subject. I told her that I respect her opinion, but that without having done the proper research, I would not stop doing it because of how it makes her "feel". I told her that her ultimatum was just fertilizing the field for future lies and that she should be careful how she treats this situation since it was honesty that she was demanding, and now finally receiving.

After nearly two hours of talking and tears, I told her that my position would not change on the subject and that if she wants me to take her opinion seriously, she needed to educate herself and I headed to the gym.

When I got back, she had spent those two hours combing the internet for information. Of course she found the propaganda as well as some truth, and as it turned out, some of her biggest fears were that it can cause mood alterations or "roid rage" and that it is physically and psychologically addictive. I told her that psychologically, sure, anything can be addictive, but that it is not physically addictive. I also explained that "roid rage" may exist in people with pre existing problems, but that these people shouldn't be taking drugs to begin with. I also explained again the difference between responsible use vs. abuse and that I won't cross that line.

For all of her fears, I think her biggest fear was that I was changing without her and that I would no longer want the same future that we have been planning for ourselves. She didn't know how, or in what way that may have changed, but she thought it must have or that it will. I assured her and promised that nothing has changed, and that all of our plans are still on the same track that they were 48 hours ago, and that the only thing different now is she is fully informed.

She seems to have accepted it now. I hope that is the end of it, as I am exhausted from dealing with it.

[Reloaded]

Make her watch bigger faster stonger

Edit: Leave her

[Bennny]

Way to stick to your guns dude.

[MichaelWayne]

Don't ask, don't tell...is that a two way street? Or just for you?

If you love a person and trust that person, that means you have to tell everything current in your life. I don't care to hear about a person past...its the past, but I kinda like knowing what is going on in the present.

Plus, its easier to weed out the people you shouldn't be with. If my fiance didn't want me doing it, I wouldn't be with her. Its a part of my life, she knows the positives and negatives because of the education I gave her on the subject. People don't just gain 15lbs a months for no reason and using someones ignorance as a crutch is no way to have a healthy relationship.

[red barraca]

Make her watch bigger faster stonger

Edit: Leave her

did the same thing with my wife told her about it,i told her i would leave her if she did'nt like it,and sat her down and watched BFS:D it's allgood

[Random Letters]

Don't ask, don't tell...is that a two way street? Or just for you?

Two way street. I believe in a modicum of privacy, so long as it is not something that hurts me or others.


If you love a person and trust that person, that means you have to tell everything current in your life. I don't care to hear about a person past...its the past, but I kinda like knowing what is going on in the present.

Life isn't so black and white...


Plus, its easier to weed out the people you shouldn't be with. If my fiance didn't want me doing it, I wouldn't be with her. Its a part of my life, she knows the positives and negatives because of the education I gave her on the subject. People don't just gain 15lbs a months for no reason and using someones ignorance as a crutch is no way to have a healthy relationship.

I was with her long before I started using AAS. If it was a choice, the drugs or her, I would choose her without hesitation. She is amazing.

[Jack of All]

I got my wifes approval before I even tried a porhormone. She trusted me to take care of myself and my family. I got a good one;)

[HANEYCOLEMAN]

All too familiar. i went through this crap before my divorce and yes i hated every moment of it. No matter how much you try to explain; they are already brainwashed by the media. Now eveything i have is prescibe well most of it. I believe no-one should tell their girl unless she is somewhat in or familiar with the industry. once they start to train and look good. then they understand. But i say be careful bro as now she has leverage on you and could easilly turn your ass in.

p.s have her log onto s...............com i dont know if i can put the name down. but you will figure it out.

[BULLDOZER]

hell, I couldn't read all that but the last thing you need is to tell her anything. I mean come on bro, are you really going to quit? I didn't think so. Tell her its none of her business, everyone's got a vice. If she cant handle that then kick her to the curb. there are plenty of broads who dig dope.

[BarbellBeast]

I told my girl I had been on them for a year and a half without any noticeable rage or other issues and explained in extreme detail the compounds that I've used and the post cycle therapy. She trusts that I know what I'm doing. If she made me decide, and gave me good reasoning then I'd choose her. A little amp of test isn't worth losing a partner.

[Johnny Phenomenon]

That shit sounded fucked from jump street. I tell them all right from the get go. If they don't like it or don't try to understand, I don't usually put too much stock into them.

[indianamonster1986]

That's why i love my g/f. She is cool as hell and a great mother. Doesn't drink, smoke or go out since our baby, and does not care if I juice but she does not want me to when we are struggling with money so I don't.

[BK]

I believe in telling them upfront. Keeping a secret like that is just too hard imo. I don't have the time or energy to do that. Tell them what u do and if they don't like it, move on.

[47ronin]

I used to try to keep it a secret from all of the women I've dated until one day I decided it would be easier to be upfront about everything than to hide shit and constantly worry about being caught and how she'll react. If you feel you have to hide it from her your relationship might not be as strong as you think. I don't mean to be a dick but if this girl is someone you want to be with for a long time then you shouldn't have to hide or stop doing things you like. The same goes for porn. All my married friends have their porn hidden somewhere in the house so their wives won't find it, mine is in the entertainment center with the rest of the movies. It's who I am- take it or leave it. Good luck.

[HANEYCOLEMAN]

well see thats the problem you guys are talking about girlfriends. thats just that fucking girlfriends. i would not invest that shit into a girlfriend. hell if you both are will to break the rules of dating and do all this shacking up and shit with no committment to marry. hell i would not be able to trust her that well and visa-verse. i say if you're not married than dont tell and if you are married than you have a choice. and that choice should be your wife. as for me i fucked up in the marriage ; because i did not tell. and she only got pissed because she wanted the upper end onme in divorce court.

[Random Letters]

she wanted the upper hand on me in divorce court.

And that is where the "grey area" begins...if there are kids involved, and a custody battle, playing the "he's on steroids" card is the nail in the coffin. Particularly in todays climate.

That wasn't my reasoning, I was just being a pussy and didn't want to have to deal with the fallout. I didn't realise at the time that one cycle would turn into a lifestyle, and that my original lie (the act of not telling her) would snowball into what it became.

Again, I'm not saying one way or the other if you should tell your significant other. There are too many variables for a blanket statement.

[MRT]

Murder her and dispose of the corpse by feeding the limb's to pigs

[Sledge]

There is a media report you can find on you tube. It's a bryant gumble 2 part segment on steroids. It pre dates Bigger stronger faster by a few years and is a little more credable to your average citizen. I'd find it for you but youtube is blocked here at work.
I highly recomend it if your trying to explain all the negative hype to someone who dosn't understand.

[Random Letters]

There is a media report you can find on you tube. It's a bryant gumble 2 part segment on steroids. It pre dates Bigger stronger faster by a few years and is a little more credable to your average citizen. I'd find it for you but youtube is blocked here at work.
I highly recomend it if your trying to explain all the negative hype to someone who dosn't understand.


Yeah, I know what video you're talking about. It was called "The Truth about Steroids". Very good, and from a legitimate source.

[BarbellBeast]

Murder her and dispose of the corpse by feeding the limb's to pigs

Ah Mexican Mafia style. This happened to a friend's wife's best friend's uncle. He was a middle man in the mafia with a pig farm and started to get behind on protection money...so he hasn't been seen for months now. Eatin by your own damn pigs, what a bitch.:(

P.S. You're a sick man.