Masturbation causing Depression

[DaveV]

Here's TMI and which will probably ruin my rep here but I am wondering about this alot.

Whenever I jerk off I get depressed. I feel dirty and need to shower right away. I continue to be depressed for a day or two. What the hell is up with that? I asked my spiritual advisor on how to stop doing this and he told me I should workout when I feel a sexual urge. To do 5 minutes cardio or do some benching. Anything physical exerting until the urge goes away. I've asked a doctor about this and was told it's just a form of depression and that I just may not enjoy the act of sex. But I've never had sex. So I don't know if I like it or not.

I want a relationship with a woman, but not random sex. I want wife material.

In the meantime I don't want to jerk off anymore. Do you think this exercising thing has any merit to it? I get pretty down after the deed and usually feel guilty.

[tight booty]

You shouldn't feel depressed about something which is perfectly natural. Everybody masturbates and those who deny it are either lying or the ones who have never masturbated are sexually repressed. A person learns alot from masturbating, especially women. And sexual therapists will encourage a woman to masturbate so that she learns what turns her on and she can take that into a relationship and show her partner and teach him. So how can that make it wrong if it is used by therapists?
I think that what you are feeling is guilt which has probably been installed in you from your childhood. If you change the way you think about it then the feelings of dirtiness, guilt and depression will go away!

[DaveV]

I think that what you are feeling is guilt which has probably been installed in you from your childhood.

Nobody taught me shit about sex in my childhood. Neither my parents nor much in school. I am religious and masturbation is frowned upon. So is promiscuous sex. These are things that may have installed this into me I would think. Rather than something from my childhood. My parents aren't religious, but I chose to give my life to God on my own. I quit drinking alcohol with the power of prayer. I can do anything with the strength of God.


(I don't really want this to turn into a religious debate but I want to be really honest about myself to actually get help)

[Mike Hunt]

Theres nothing wrong with masturbation.Its natural and most people do it.No need to feel depressed if you rub one out.lol

[DaveV]

Theres nothing wrong with masturbation.Its natural and most people do it.No need to feel depressed if you rub one out.lol

I know that. I know everyone gets urges, we are sexual being after all. It's that I for some reason, feel guilty about it. Usually to the point where I tear myself up inside about it. It's something that shouldn't bother me, but does.

[Skeptic]

It seems inconsistent to me that you would be a guilty Christian wrt masturbation, and be asking for advice in such a liberal forum.

If your guilt comes from your interpretation of what God expects from you, there's nothing I can offer.

TB is right (damn that hurt). The more we learn aboot our environment, the more we learn that it's a completely normal thing that all primates and many other mammals do.

[DaveV]

Where do I really have to ask? I've already asked my spirtual advisor and asked my doctor. One says it's a chemical imbalance, it's just depression. The other isn't a doctor so only advises me in how to ignore it.... by physical exertion exercise to distract the mind.

I got interested in religion from an HBO special, a movie station notorious for it's violence, profanity, and sex. So go figure huh?

[goforbroke]

I'm a christian also, but ALL guys rub one out whenever the need arises. I honestly don't think masturbation is frowned upon within christ, because you aren't physically lusting after someone and your not even married on top of it. In your case masturbation is better then sex out of wed lock. Its just natural man, I bet your pastor even rubs one out on a daily basis.

I used to feel guilty also sorta but that was years ago when I was a lot younger. A sin is a sin no matter what it is.......
Just look at what forum I'm lurking on.......

[pittbull]

sounds like to me you might suffering from some type of release in your body after masturbating that causes you to get depressed. Like a chemical imbalance or etc, then your body adjusts itself back. Also I have a best friend that says he tries not to masturbate or does it very little and is having alot of trouble in his relationship because he doesnt want to have sex because he says it makes him feel dirty and guilty and etc.

He says it has alot to do with religion and him being molested as a child. To be honest I still just dont get it. I think things happen to alot of people when they are young and it doesnt affect their sex life, but I guess everyone is different.

I have never been the type to let anything interfere with my "personal time" haha. Stress, hardship or whatever has never interrupted my sex drive or anything. Hell sometimes I yank it 2-3 times a day and still want some more.....and feel great about it.

Maybe you need to see a counselor or something. It almost sounds like to me that you might need to take a slight anti depressant or something if it is really that bad....you might be releasing something in your body when you cum to cause this depression..

I will tell you this though, you better figure it out now because if you have these feelings with just yourself, if you ever are in a relationship than you will make the other person feel like its them thats causing it and that is a horrible feeling to have. It will definitely ruin a relationship, I am watching that first hand with my best friend.

[Ortski]

I know you dont want to turn this into a religious debate but all this is because of religion.

The church says masturbation is bad.

you have devoted your life to the church.

so when you masturbate you feel bad, guilty, ashamed.

its as simple as that.

For someone who professes to love god, you should understand that god will love you wether you masturbate or not. have you not been taught/told gods love is unconditional??

[BABOON]

Son, knocking one out to some porn is one of Mans few pleasures in life.

Also, when an old lady falls over, I always laugh, then feel a bit guilty. But I still laughed and had a good time watching her fall. So I don't sweat the guilt too much.

Also, don't be stupid about marriage material, you don't marry before you've built up some technique. What kind of asshole traps a girl in marriage if he doesn't even know how to satisfy a woman? Find some skanks, some fat girls, anything that will lay on it's back-you practice on the ugly ones..

[Mr X]

Find some skanks, some fat girls, anything that will lay on it's back-you practice on the ugly ones..

ahh words to live by.

[Reloaded]

Here's TMI and which will probably ruin my rep here but I am wondering about this alot.

Whenever I jerk off I get depressed. I feel dirty and need to shower right away. I continue to be depressed for a day or two. What the hell is up with that? I asked my spiritual advisor on how to stop doing this and he told me I should workout when I feel a sexual urge. To do 5 minutes cardio or do some benching. Anything physical exerting until the urge goes away. I've asked a doctor about this and was told it's just a form of depression and that I just may not enjoy the act of sex. But I've never had sex. So I don't know if I like it or not.

I want a relationship with a woman, but not random sex. I want wife material.

In the meantime I don't want to jerk off anymore. Do you think this exercising thing has any merit to it? I get pretty down after the deed and usually feel guilty.

There is the problem right there, stop listening to that douche.

You need to slay some hoodrats before you move up in the game, you will get "wife material" and not know how to plow it right, then she will leave you for a guy like Buster12

WTF that is one of the greatest things you could do for yourself, hey ! if you don't love yourself, how can you love someone else ?

[Big Sky Guy]

If you believe you can truly do all things through Christ, then make the change and stop doing the thing that you feel guilty about.

No different than you stopped drinking with prayer and the power of God.

At this point, it does not matter if it is a chemical imbalance or just plain guilt that is putting you into a depression, the way to make it stop is to stop.

There is nothing wrong with wanting marrying material and going into your wedding night with no experience. Don't let anyone's opinion deter you from that goal. Never met a person who truly regretted saving themself for marriage.

[Sistersteel]

I am not a physician and not qualified to offer advice or diagnose medical conditions but, I have seen this before. I guess my question would be, how old are you, and how often do you masturbate? Gathering by your post, I am inclined to think you are very young and masturbate frequently. Besides your religious beliefs which can certainly contribute to the guilt and depression you are feeling, frequent masturbation and ejaculation stimulate acetylcholine/parasympathetic nervous functions excessively, resulting in the over production of sex hormones and neurotransmitters such as acetylcholine, dopamine and serotonin.

Not trying to get too scientific on you, but follow me for a minute. Abundant and unusual amount of these hormones and neurotransmitters can cause the brain and adrenal glands to perform excessive dopamine-norepinephrine-epinephrine conversion and turn the brain and body functions to be extremely sympathetic. In other words, there is a big change of body chemistry when one excessively masturbates.

If you are not on any ACE's, MAOI's, SSRI's or cortisol or prolactin inhibitors, then it is most likely a NT or a hormone (cortisol/prolactin) release issue. This male refractory period you are experiencing is caused by a post-ejaculatory spike in prolactin. Anecdotal evidence indicates that vitex extract reduces or even eliminates the refractory period in men by reducing prolactin production. Cabergoline and other drugs that lower prolactin will likely have the same effect.

Just my 2cc


SS

[Reloaded]

Oh god it is SIMPLE RELIGION has ruined yet another thing...

[BABOON]

Yeah, forget about your spiritual advisor, he's clearly a fucking idiot..

When I first started masturbing(well before I was 10, I gets downnnn..) I always felt guilty afterwards. Loads of people experience exactly that. We feel guilty about a lot of shit we do, but we let it slide because the action that led to the guilt was worth the punishment for doing it.

You know if you go out to a bar and get slaughtered that you're going to probably have a headache the next day, we pay for everything in life, no good time is free.

The guilt doesn't last, it's just something everyone goes through. I can't say if it's social or psychological, but it's something 99% of people experience when they first start masturbating. It's only going to become an issue if you let it. Throw some porn on, knock one out, relish the guilt. You've just jerked off to some girl getting ploughed in the ass on camera for a measly 500 bucks.

You need to sack your spiritual advisor the fuck off and learn about your body for yourself. Also, your doctor is a fucking idiot.

The guilt is completely normal and it will go. If you let it.

[DaveV]

I am not a physician and not qualified to offer advice or diagnose medical conditions but, I have seen this before. I guess my question would be, how old are you, and how often do you masturbate? Gathering by your post, I am inclined to think you are very young and masturbate frequently. Besides your religious beliefs which can certainly contribute to the guilt and depression you are feeling, frequent masturbation and ejaculation stimulate acetylcholine/parasympathetic nervous functions excessively, resulting in the over production of sex hormones and neurotransmitters such as acetylcholine, dopamine and serotonin.

Not trying to get too scientific on you, but follow me for a minute. Abundant and unusual amount of these hormones and neurotransmitters can cause the brain and adrenal glands to perform excessive dopamine-norepinephrine-epinephrine conversion and turn the brain and body functions to be extremely sympathetic. In other words, there is a big change of body chemistry when one excessively masturbates.

If you are not on any ACE's, MAOI's, SSRI's or cortisol or prolactin inhibitors, then it is most likely a NT or a hormone (cortisol/prolactin) release issue. This male refractory period you are experiencing is caused by a post-ejaculatory spike in prolactin. Anecdotal evidence indicates that vitex extract reduces or even eliminates the refractory period in men by reducing prolactin production. Cabergoline and other drugs that lower prolactin will likely have the same effect.

Just my 2cc


SS

27, crank it probably once every 2 weeks. I take an SSRI.

[Ortski]

Dave...

serious question...do you think god will not like you if you have a wank every now and again?

[Suzy Brown]

There is not a single verse in the Bible that mentions wankin. That leads me to think God doesn't care all that much about it.

[Ortski]

god didnt even write the bible!

probably too busy wanking...

[Suzy Brown]

Think about it: God made 10 commandments, nothing about wanking. Moses made 1000s of laws for the Hebrews and none mentioned wanking. Jesus had 2 commandments for Christians, nothing about wankin!!

So don't sweat it. If those guys found wankin to be a non-issue, so should you.

[Suzy Brown]

I'll also mention, the first time I gave a guy a BJ (in high school) I had snake dreams for weeks!

[Sistersteel]

I might not find the humor in many of the things some of you people entertain yourselves with at the expense of others. However, I do make an effort to allow for freedom of expression, and perhaps a joke here and there in good fun. But if this thread was moved into these forums, it was because a staff member thought that the poster had a legitimate concern that needed to be addressed. I do not think most of these posts are insightful or therapeutic. And personally, I do not appreciate the words "wanking" and "God" used in the same sentence in that blasphemous context. There are other forums better suited for that.

So please spare me the trouble of having to go back and edit and delete posts because some of you could not reciprocate the respect I try to show most of you when you are in these forums. Had this thread never been moved, most of you would have probably never even thought of dropping by to show support or offer any sort of constructive criticism. These forums are strictly moderated.


Last warning.

[Strikerrjones]

It doesn't seem to me like they were trolling or engaging in personal attacks. DaveV said he was religious, and a few people figured that maybe the guilt he feels is due to his religion. They then provided proof that major religious figures and texts said nothing about God hating masturbating in an effort to help him not feel guilty about it for that reason. Nowhere in the forum rules does it say anything about not including the word "god" in the same sentence as the word "wanking". So long as they weren't engaging in personal attacks, which to my eyes they weren't, I don't see how it's a violation of these forum rules: http://forums.rxmuscle.com/announcement.php?f=2


I'm not trying to attack you, Sistersteel, but I think you might be overreacting a bit and don't want anybody getting infractions due to a misunderstanding.

[Suzy Brown]

I myself was absolutly not trying to be offensive, disrespectful or make a joke of this at all.
I was just trying to put the situation in a context no one else had mentioned yet.

[Angela123]

It doesn't seem to me like they were trolling or engaging in personal attacks. DaveV said he was religious, and a few people figured that maybe the guilt he feels is due to his religion. They then provided proof that major religious figures and texts said nothing about God hating masturbating in an effort to help him not feel guilty about it for that reason. Nowhere in the forum rules does it say anything about not including the word "god" in the same sentence as the word "wanking". So long as they weren't engaging in personal attacks, which to my eyes they weren't, I don't see how it's a violation of these forum rules: http://forums.rxmuscle.com/announcement.php?f=2


I'm not trying to attack you, Sistersteel, but I think you might be overreacting a bit and don't want anybody getting infractions due to a misunderstanding.


no, but wording can be different. it is obvious he is very religious and he seriously wants advice/help. even such words as 'wanking' make it seem like no one is taking his post serious. yes, wanking is not offensive, but it is making light of the situation. if the correct term was used, which is 'masturbation', the posts would have come off in a more serious manner.

ss simply said, "I personally" when referring to the dislike of seeing 'God' and 'wanking' in the same sentence. she would not give an infraction for that.

the transform your life forum has its own set of rules. yes, free speech, your own beliefs and opinoins are welcome..but there needs to be respect. it is stated that you should respect other's beliefs and be open to understanding them. you guys dont have to agree with Dave, but you can at least stop and think, "hmmm...i can see where he is coming from, considering his past." this forum is different than the other forums on here.

I have posted some issues in this forum and i would feel very, very hurt and upset if i got these sort of replies. this may seem like a joke or a stupid problem to many of you, but to him, it is serious. im sure some of the stuff i posted on here sounded stupid and ridiculous as well. but it is a very serious matter to me. we all have our issues. we need to respect everyone on here

if this was in any other forum, you could get away with 'whatever.' it started out in 18 and over, but i moved it here bc i thought he'd get actual help and advice here. so b4 i moved it, i deleted those comments i felt violated the transform your life forum rules.

the posts that had been deleted previously were of no help to this young man. i think one of them was," i like sticking things in my ass instead of masturbating" or "the Virgin Mary is good porn." or something to that extent. that is not needed in this thread.

[Angela123]

let me try to put this in perspective for you. im sorry but the reason i am on a rant is because i personally have problems that i take very seriously. i expect people to at least give me respect in regards to them and to listen to what i have to say. instead of just saying random off the wall shit. i take depression very seriously and dave is going into a depression after he masturbates. that is not good. there are problems there. it should not be taken light of.

and yes he is religious. many of you are not. which is fine. but no need to just keep making posts about how religion is bad or that God doesnt say masturbation is bad. Dave is religious...period. you guys are not going to change his views. so just respect that he is religious and let that drop.

i will use myself as an example. i have hardcore, serious issues with my body image, food phobias, compulsive binge eating and the depression that is caused by it all. it goes beyond just the usual body image and binge eating issues most bb have, it started b4 i even knew what bb was. anyway, i dont expect many people to understand where im coming from, bc it is complex. but i do at least expect respect in this forum. if i posted my deal anywhere else on the board, i would expect a few off the wall comments, but in here, no i would not. which is is why i came clean on here. i post stuff that i have kept hidden from people on here. but i felt comfortable enough in this forum to open up. there was one post that upset me when i posted my issue, but he was still very repsectful...he was just naive.

i have posted many long posts in here. it is obvious i have issues with compulsive binging and my depression i get from it is serious. and let's say i got a reply that went like this, "oh come on. just stop eating. geez. it cant be that hard. and im sure you dont get hardcore depressed. im sure you get a little sad, like the rest of us. but how can u get hardcore depressed from just eating. you dont have a problem, just dont eat."

that sort of response is what you guys are giving Dave. yes, the context is different, but it holds the same type of attitude that i am reading in many of the posts in this thread. it is showing that you are not trying to understand where he is coming from and that you are simply not really showing his problem any respect.

[Por2gue]

I myself was absolutly not trying to be offensive, disrespectful or make a joke of this at all.
I was just trying to put the situation in a context no one else had mentioned yet.
Don't worry, my post was deleted for responding in a way this guy needed. I think everyone forgot him from MD, cause they are all hook line and sinkered....hilarious.

[Stavman]

. And personally, I do not appreciate the words "wanking" and "God" used in the same sentence in that blasphemous context.

Last warning.

So you are going to warn us because of your religious beliefs? I could swear that wasn't in the rules of this website.

Lol at blasphemous.

[Angela123]

this forum has different rules than the rest of the board.

http://forums.rxmuscle.com/showthread.php?t=3381

she was warning you because in the rules that are stated, respect towards other's beliefs and opinoins are expected. she does not like the words "wanking" and "God" used together. so please give her respect and use "God" and "masturbation." that is all she is saying. respect.

[esplendido]

The Bible DOES teach that a man should not covet his neighbor's wife, that the young man should avoid the lust of the eyes (including women) and that the young man who is enticed by the prostitute is a fool.

If Dave requires lustful thoughts of sexual activity with a known or pretend woman to masterbate, he violates several Biblical commands. The Bible also teaches that if you've thought it (as in thought it through), it's as bad as doing it.

I say this in defense of Dave's spiritual position and because the rest of you have NO biblical knowledge or understanding. It's not the masterbation that's sin in the Bible. If you can complete the job by staring at a potted plant.....good for you! It's the thought process behind the masterbation that the Bible takes issue with.

If you're not a believer....do what you want. But if Dave is using the Bible as his guide (did he say that?), then he has reason to feel guilt if he's lusting to perform.

[Sistersteel]

My dear strikerrjones, had you been a frequent visitor of these forums and honored us with your intellect in discussions that did not pertain to masturbation on a more regular basis, you would have known that the rules and regulations of this forum are the following:

http://forums.rxmuscle.com/showthread.php?t=3381

And yes, you will not find any rule that states, verbatim, that the use of words like "wanking" and "God" in a blasphemous context was prohibited. I wrote the rules with the intention of appealing to logical adults, equipped with sufficient analytical skills to abide by a few simple guidelines without the aid of a glossary.

I am entitled to my own opinion as well. I gave a warning because the thread had gone sour far before I had the chance to prune it and take out the trash. There were more posts deleted on this thread by other staff members than I've deleted on this entire forum since I've been here.

So, my dear, there was no misunderstanding at all as far as I am concerned. So thank you for your insightful post.

And quite honestly, I am very grateful that Ondrea was kind enough to clean this thread up before I had the chance to relish in the venomous filth that passes for humor these days.

We support people in these forums. We do not condemn them. No matter what series of circumstances have led certain individuals down a self destructive path, anyone who ends up posting in these forums is in dire need of an intervention. People who openly discuss life altering issues and struggles are looking for hope, guidance, support....kindness. Consolation. Compassion.

Staff members, me included, contribute to these forums. I take offense to the bickering of juveniles who have nothing constructive or useful to contribute.

Ignorance is bliss, they say. I can only imagine the state of perpetual euphoria that some of you must experience on a constant basis. The best part of that high is it costs you nothing but a few laughs at the expense of someone else. You don't even need to worry about damaging brain cells!

Your ignorance renders you oblivious to other people's suffering. It morphs you into mindless drones with no understanding or appreciation for the therapeutic value that some of these discussions have to certain people. Do not underestimate the power of the spoken word.

It upsets me that Dave should PM me and ask me to pull this thread because he felt insulted and hurt. The only thing I am tempted to pull right now is someone's tongue. Would some self righteous individual like to humor me by looking up the board rules again and lecturing me how inappropriate threats are?

Feel free to drop me a PM if you feel a desperate urge to educate me on how to do my bloody job.

Spare me. You demand respect yet you do not feel the need to reciprocate it. You question my authority and make a mockery of my rules in my forum. Why don't you come pay me a visit at home and tell me how you would like me to move my shit around to accommodate you. My door is open to everyone, trash talking blasphemous pastors and bible thumping pedophiles alike.

You are all welcome.. until your rubbish rubs off and stains or tarnishes any of my favorite things. And my favorite "things" in this forum are people's troubles that might range from post-ejaculation depression (known as wanking to simple folk), to utter self loathing that results in self castration.

If you don't like the rules of this forum, then spare me and members with genuine concerns your mindless jabber, and kindly refrain from posting in here. I promise never to impose my beliefs on you. I hate it that esplendido had to actually waste his words of wisdom in a heartfelt attempt at educating some of you. Great post esplendido, by the way!

You don't like my ethics or principles, you can bite me. I do not throw my pearls before swine anyway.

I am locking this thread. Don't let the door hit you on the way out.


Respect,

SS