Why do Some People Abuse Drugs?

[Sistersteel]

There's no easy answer to this one - every individual is different - but there are some factors that are commonly associated with drug abuse.


There's a big difference between why a person may try drugs for the first time and why that same person may then keep on taking them - again and again. Many people may try illicit drugs once or twice just out of curiosity - and feel no compulsion to repeat the experience.



Similarly, many people drink alcohol occasionally and have no problem at all about it - they do not get worried if they don't have a drink. But some people do.


For many people, drugs (including alcohol) can seem to provide something that is missing from their life - these substances can make them feel 'better' - for a while anyway. This can take a lot of forms.
People may abuse drugs because:


http://www.recovery.org.uk/images/rd_star.gif They feel insecure about themselves . . . . . and the drug can provide self-confidence or assertiveness (often demonstrated as aggression).
http://www.recovery.org.uk/images/rd_star.gif They feel lonely or unloved . . . . . and the drug is a friend - a best friend.
http://www.recovery.org.uk/images/rd_star.gif They feel alienated, not a part of society . . . . . and the company of other drug users can provide a sense of belonging.
http://www.recovery.org.uk/images/rd_star.gif They feel angry or resentful - at family, partners, life, god . . . . . and getting stoned or drunk etc. can blot out these uncomfortable feelings.
http://www.recovery.org.uk/images/rd_star.gif They feel stressed or scared as a result of some life situation . . . . . and drugs or booze can seem to relieve this sort of anxiety.
http://www.recovery.org.uk/images/rd_star.gif They're unhappy with life in the home, job, school, neighborhood - whatever . . . . . and drugs provide a means of escape for a while - a way of living in a fantasy world that seems better than the real one.


These are just a few examples - each person will have their own reasons for abusing drugs or alcohol. The common basis to most of these is that drugs provide a means of escape from uncomfortable feelings. They appear to offer a sort of alternative world - where the user feels strong, powerful, relaxed, loved etc. - and his or her immediate environment appears safe and attractive. This fantasy offers pleasant feelings that are missing from the user's real life situation.

But a fantasy is just a dream. Reality keeps coming back. So a drug user must keep taking more and more drugs to try and keep the fantasy alive.

[R.I.P.]

you know in the beginning i used cuz everyone did.so i did it too. i wanted to be like my big brothers and they were hippies .it was fun for along time. then one day i noticed it wasn't fun anymorebut i kept using. i didn't know i had a choice. thank god i found NA, today i have a choice. i choose drug free, just for today.

[Sistersteel]

Thanks for another insightful post, Tim. I always look forward to your contributions brother.

SS

[R.I.P.]

thanks Sister .i really appreciate it.

[tight booty]

Drugs become an escape and enable a person to forget their problems, while they are on them. But then the drug becomes a problem and the person is in a vicious cycle.

[R.I.P.]

i loved dope more than life itself. what i didn't love was the physical, mental, and spiritual consequences.

[cobra]

It's funny, growin up I watched my Dad and his alcohol addiction (which now had an added opiate addiction when he had a car wreck-drunk of course-which nearly took his life and thus began the docs endless scripts) and how he treated my mom, verbally abusive and at time physically, and I was scared to death of it, repulsed by it, and said to myself from a young age, I WILL NEVER BE LIKE THAT!

Well, first time I used I was around 13, had no real reason to use, I jjust remember sittin in class one day w.some friends and thinkin I would like to smoke pot and see what that's like, told them, we got some, and did it, I fell in love! Long story short, over the years it progressed into anything and everything under the sun until I finally hit a bottom w/the OC's-mainly the physical symptoms is what did it for me. I was SOOOOOO fuckin sick man. ANYWAY, got a little lost in that, what I'm tryin to get at is I turned out just like my old man. Strung out, angry at the world, verbally and at time physically abusive to my g/f.

Why did I use? I dunno. Could it have been resentments or somethin inside w/my father and the things I witnessed w/him and my mom? Possibly, but I don't really think so. I kinda think it was just some predetermined thing, maybe a genetic thing as I have a long history of alcoholism and drug probs within my family. I just remember becoming so aware of myself in like 2nd grade, like physically, I had big ears and shit as a child and remember just bein so insecure about that, IN SECOND GRADE! C'mon now, I would think a child that age could give a fuck less about somethin like that, hell kids don;t even start makin fun of each other at the age LOL. Anyway, I'm kinda just carryin on now. But, I know alot was based on insecurity, Thanks for lettin me share lol!

[Sistersteel]

It's funny, growin up I watched my Dad and his alcohol addiction (which now had an added opiate addiction when he had a car wreck-drunk of course-which nearly took his life and thus began the docs endless scripts) and how he treated my mom, verbally abusive and at time physically, and I was scared to death of it, repulsed by it, and said to myself from a young age, I WILL NEVER BE LIKE THAT!

Well, first time I used I was around 13, had no real reason to use, I jjust remember sittin in class one day w.some friends and thinkin I would like to smoke pot and see what that's like, told them, we got some, and did it, I fell in love! Long story short, over the years it progressed into anything and everything under the sun until I finally hit a bottom w/the OC's-mainly the physical symptoms is what did it for me. I was SOOOOOO fuckin sick man. ANYWAY, got a little lost in that, what I'm tryin to get at is I turned out just like my old man. Strung out, angry at the world, verbally and at time physically abusive to my g/f.

Why did I use? I dunno. Could it have been resentments or somethin inside w/my father and the things I witnessed w/him and my mom? Possibly, but I don't really think so. I kinda think it was just some predetermined thing, maybe a genetic thing as I have a long history of alcoholism and drug probs within my family. I just remember becoming so aware of myself in like 2nd grade, like physically, I had big ears and shit as a child and remember just bein so insecure about that, IN SECOND GRADE! C'mon now, I would think a child that age could give a fuck less about somethin like that, hell kids don;t even start makin fun of each other at the age LOL. Anyway, I'm kinda just carryin on now. But, I know alot was based on insecurity, Thanks for lettin me share lol!


And that you VERY much for sharing. I can relate to your story and I too, had an abusive drunk for a father. Kids are highly susceptible to the influences of their parents who are supposed to serve as role models. Keep coming back my friend. Its a pleasure to have you with us.

SS

[R.I.P.]

i don't think many of us woke up one day when we were little and said , i think i would like to be a dope fiend when i get old. i used for the first time to be like everybody else. i wanted to be cool and liked and all that shit.hell i didn't even know i was insecure til i got clean. there's a saying that says we are egomaniacs with an insecurity complex. i know i used to fit that bill, and to be honest still do. just not so much. thank god.

[odecl1min]

I abused caffeine to balance my boring office job, but this lead to sleepless nights. I end up smoking bud to help me relax and sleep. But now that I've read Sistersteel's star points, of why people use, I may have a bigger problem than I thought.

[AVBG]

I think it's genetic and for some people, the line between use/abuse is so fine that at the time you don't even notice when you cross it. You become resentful of "friends" when they decide it's time to clean up their act (party poopers) and by the time you realize a problem it in some cases has transcended from the weed to something else ie alcohol, uppers/downers, opiates ect.

I firmly believe that addicts have addictive personalities and their "poison" can range from OCD all the way to narcotics - that's their way of dealing with issues that come up, they throw themselves (more often than not without noticing it) in that takes the edge of the harsher points in life.

[odecl1min]

I think it's genetic and for some people, the line between use/abuse is so fine that at the time you don't even notice when you cross it. You become resentful of "friends" when they decide it's time to clean up their act (party poopers) and by the time you realize a problem it in some cases has transcended from the weed to something else ie alcohol, uppers/downers, opiates ect.

I firmly believe that addicts have addictive personalities and their "poison" can range from OCD all the way to narcotics - that's their way of dealing with issues that come up, they throw themselves (more often than not without noticing it) in that takes the edge of the harsher points in life.

"party poopers" LOL...

These people that have an "addictive personality" just don't have a strong enough reason to quit. I don't think its genetics; they just don't care. I've done plenty in the past, and the only reason why I don't anymore is because I'm scared for my health. So... everyone just stop and think!

[AVBG]

don't have a strong enough reason to quit. I don't think its genetics; they just don't care.

Do you really believe that the alcoholic, junkie or crackhead that has lost their family, career and health doesn't have enough reason to quit or they don't care what their addiction has done or is doing?

It's not as simple as giving up a bit of bud to be motivated to getting your workouts in...

[odecl1min]

Do you really believe that the alcoholic, junkie or crackhead that has lost their family, career and health doesn't have enough reason to quit or they don't care what their addiction has done or is doing?

It's not as simple as giving up a bit of bud to be motivated to getting your workouts in...

Yea I see what you're saying. I just meant that I don't believe their born with an addictive personality. I still think its their choice. But yea you're right its not that simple. They just keep doing things to mask their problems, like what tight booty said.

I've been through the spiral of drug use, and it's damn hard to snap out of that mindset. I was lucky to have taken a long enough break that I actually realized all the stupid crap I've done. So I believe if they stop long enough to realize what they're doing, and hopefully didn't mess themselves up too bad, they'd hop back on their feet if they care to. :(

[quadzilla33]

I believe its a genetic. Addiction is a disease. I dont know where i read this, but there is no such thing as an addictive personality. If you were to take a personality test there is no way to recognize that one is an addict. on a side note, one of my friends just met his brother on facebook, they are both in there late 20's, living on opposite sides of the world(one in canadan and the other in australia, interesting thing is that he told me him and his brother have so much in common as they both train, take supplements and ride motorbikes, yet they grew up with different parents, i guess training and riding is in their genes.

[AVBG]

I only used the word "personality" for want of a better word.

[tight booty]

It's funny, growin up I watched my Dad and his alcohol addiction (which now had an added opiate addiction when he had a car wreck-drunk of course-which nearly took his life and thus began the docs endless scripts) and how he treated my mom, verbally abusive and at time physically, and I was scared to death of it, repulsed by it, and said to myself from a young age, I WILL NEVER BE LIKE THAT!

Well, first time I used I was around 13, had no real reason to use, I jjust remember sittin in class one day w.some friends and thinkin I would like to smoke pot and see what that's like, told them, we got some, and did it, I fell in love! Long story short, over the years it progressed into anything and everything under the sun until I finally hit a bottom w/the OC's-mainly the physical symptoms is what did it for me. I was SOOOOOO fuckin sick man. ANYWAY, got a little lost in that, what I'm tryin to get at is I turned out just like my old man. Strung out, angry at the world, verbally and at time physically abusive to my g/f.

Why did I use? I dunno. Could it have been resentments or somethin inside w/my father and the things I witnessed w/him and my mom? Possibly, but I don't really think so. I kinda think it was just some predetermined thing, maybe a genetic thing as I have a long history of alcoholism and drug probs within my family. I just remember becoming so aware of myself in like 2nd grade, like physically, I had big ears and shit as a child and remember just bein so insecure about that, IN SECOND GRADE! C'mon now, I would think a child that age could give a fuck less about somethin like that, hell kids don;t even start makin fun of each other at the age LOL. Anyway, I'm kinda just carryin on now. But, I know alot was based on insecurity, Thanks for lettin me share lol!
I think that drug addiction/alcoholism can be genetic. And that is why it is essential to realise that if something such as drug addiction or alcohol abuse runs in the family, then steer clear of those drugs and watch out for any kind of signs that you may be abusing them so that you can prevent a full blown addiction. That is why I believe that meddling in recreational drugs is a risk and it must be weighed up whether or not it is worth it.

[cobra]

"party poopers" LOL...

These people that have an "addictive personality" just don't have a strong enough reason to quit. I don't think its genetics; they just don't care. I've done plenty in the past, and the only reason why I don't anymore is because I'm scared for my health. So... everyone just stop and think!

This is just retarded as hell. Dude, seriously, you don't know wtf you're talkin about.

[tight booty]

Addictive personalities most certainly do exist. And drug addiction is a disease. It is not that easy to just stop, if it were then there wouldn't be addicts now would there?

[R.I.P.]

the only people that truly understand us is one of us. i have friends that used like i did that aren't addicts.my own brothers used dope but they put it down too.neither one understands why after 17 years i still go to meetings and stay involved with the fellowship i stopped arguing years ago so i just say. it is the one thing that saved my life from degradation and depravity and i'm not turning my back on people that might need me as much as i need them. god gave this to me and i feel like i would be turning my back on him.some dude on another site told me after 5-7 yearspeople don't need meetings any longer. BULLSHIT is what i say to that . who will be there for the newcomers, if people with long term recovery don't show up and let them know they can do it as well.when people don't come to meetings and work a program, it's like raping the program. that in and of itself is one of the most selfcentered things i could do. if i want to be selfcentered i'll go back to using dope. sorry for the rant.

[quadzilla33]

Hey tim, its good to see that you still go to meetings bro, I have a friend that brought me into the program and had about 7yrs clean, then stopped going to meetings, guess what happened shortly after? he relapsed! He told me he forgot how hard it was to quit.I'm learning that as a addict we really need to keep our head in check at or else we will go back to that miserable life of addiction

[R.I.P.]

Hey tim, its good to see that you still go to meetings bro, I have a friend that brought me into the program and had about 7yrs clean, then stopped going to meetings, guess what happened shortly after? he relapsed! He told me he forgot how hard it was to quit.I'm learning that as a addict we really need to keep our head in check at or else we will go back to that miserable life of addiction


hey quad, you are so right man. that what i told the bozo on the other site. i told me he was unique. church would work and if someone called he would take them to a meeting. thing is if he doesn't go to meetings how is anyone going to have his number. dude was like i can work steps and practice spiritual principles without going to meetings. i told him good luck.everyone i know that quit going to meetings, no matter what amount of cleantime they had used.there is working steps and applying steps, two different things. imo.i don't want to live like that anymore. i go to meetings.

[odecl1min]

This is just retarded as hell. Dude, seriously, you don't know wtf you're talkin about.

If you're going to tell me I'm wrong, explain how I am. I'm open minded.
I'm only speaking from my experience. I know I could be wrong, but if you're
going to tell me I'm wrong and not explain, then you leave me thinking
you don't know wtf you're talkin about.

I don't blame anyone for their actions as a teenager. I'm just saying when you're an ADULT, you need to own up to your problems. People should stop making excuses for their actions, because ultimately it's their own responsibility. When you get older, you'll realize it and laugh at all the stupid shit you've done.

"What the mind of man can conceive and believe, It can achieve."
-Napolean Hill

[Sistersteel]

If you're going to tell me I'm wrong, explain how I am. I'm open minded.
I'm only speaking from my experience. I know I could be wrong, but if you're
going to tell me I'm wrong and not explain, then you leave me thinking
you don't know wtf you're talkin about.

I don't blame anyone for their actions as a teenager. I'm just saying when you're an ADULT, you need to own up to your problems. People should stop making excuses for their actions, because ultimately it's their own responsibility. When you get older, you'll realize it and laugh at all the stupid shit you've done.

"What the mind of man can conceive and believe, It can achieve."
-Napolean Hill

odecl1min
What everyone is trying to say to you is people like us, have an illness that renders us incapable of making rational decisions for ourselves when we are in active addiction. You are thinking of addiction as a character defect, hence your assumptions that quitting is just a matter of making up your mind to do so. That could not be farther from the truth. The thing is, when an addict is in a state of active addiction, they have NO choice other than to use. We have no options. We will watch our lives go to shit and are incapable of doing anything about it because our diseased mind strips us of our ability to think rationally for ourselves and make sane choices. It is not something you can understand because you are not afflicted with this illness. Like Tim said, it takes one of us to understand us.

SS

[odecl1min]

odecl1min
What everyone is trying to say to you is people like us, have an illness that renders us incapable of making rational decisions for ourselves when we are in active addiction. You are thinking of addiction as a character defect, hence your assumptions that quitting is just a matter of making up your mind to do so. That could not be farther from the truth. The thing is, when an addict is in a state of active addiction, they have NO choice other than to use. We have no options. We will watch our lives go to shit and are incapable of doing anything about it because our diseased mind strips us of our ability to think rationally for ourselves and make sane choices. It is not something you can understand because you are not afflicted with this illness. Like Tim said, it takes one of us to understand us.

SS

I hear ya SS. Thanks for clarifying.

[cobra]

odecl1min
What everyone is trying to say to you is people like us, have an illness that renders us incapable of making rational decisions for ourselves when we are in active addiction. You are thinking of addiction as a character defect, hence your assumptions that quitting is just a matter of making up your mind to do so. That could not be farther from the truth. The thing is, when an addict is in a state of active addiction, they have NO choice other than to use. We have no options. We will watch our lives go to shit and are incapable of doing anything about it because our diseased mind strips us of our ability to think rationally for ourselves and make sane choices. It is not something you can understand because you are not afflicted with this illness. Like Tim said, it takes one of us to understand us.

SS

Word.

[sifferman]

"the company of other drug users can provide a sense of belonging."

That could be the best way to put it for me. Then it just grows from there. Wanting more and more! Just trying what ever comes your way and not carrying what is going on around. The the worry is how your going to get the next one. It is amaxing what drugs can do to you and the way you think. It is just damn out right dangerous!! For example receiving 9 W-2 forms and not even remembering that you had that many jobs in one year. What the Hell? Falling asleep at the dinner table in front of the whole family because yout so messed up. Just to mention a few out of too many to mention. It is so crazy looking back on what all the things that you did while using. it took me getting in trouble with the law and and using some more to finally get the whole pic why not to use. Sorry for going on and on. Some times just nice to release. My new addiction and saver :dunno:

[Sistersteel]

"the company of other drug users can provide a sense of belonging."

That could be the best way to put it for me. Then it just grows from there. Wanting more and more! Just trying what ever comes your way and not carrying what is going on around. The the worry is how your going to get the next one. It is amaxing what drugs can do to you and the way you think. It is just damn out right dangerous!! For example receiving 9 W-2 forms and not even remembering that you had that many jobs in one year. What the Hell? Falling asleep at the dinner table in front of the whole family because yout so messed up. Just to mention a few out of too many to mention. It is so crazy looking back on what all the things that you did while using. it took me getting in trouble with the law and and using some more to finally get the whole pic why not to use. Sorry for going on and on. Some times just nice to release. My new addiction and saver :dunno:


How old are you siffer?
What was your DOC? Sounds like an opiate. How long have you been clean? How are the steps working for you?

Keep coming back my friend.

SS

[sifferman]

I'm 25 about to be 26. Gettin up there lol. Yes opeate was the main one. I did alot different things it was just what ever was there. About two years!

[Sistersteel]

I'm 25 about to be 26. Gettin up there lol. Yes opeate was the main one. I did alot different things it was just what ever was there. About two years!

Awesome my friend!
Yup. We're getting old :)

[sifferman]

Yeah the pic is a couple of years old. I look like 15 lol.

[Sistersteel]

Yeah the pic is a couple of years old. I look like 15 lol.


Yes you do. A very hot one too. Now I sound like a pedophile. LOL
just kidding :)

[sifferman]

The pic is a couple of years old. I look like I'm 15 lol. I just tell my self I'll look good when I get older. lol

[sifferman]

lol oh it is all good. Thank you for by the way. You a hottie too! And sorry for the double post. You can delete that one if you want. I guess you can do that sort of thing.

[Sistersteel]

The pic is a couple of years old. I look like I'm 15 lol. I just tell my self I'll look good when I get older. lol


Well just as long as you are NOT 15... lol

[sifferman]

No Ma'am I'm not just the big 25!!!! lol

[Sistersteel]

No Ma'am I'm not just the big 25!!!! lol


No Ma'am..now I feel VERY old :(
or maybe very dominant.

lol

[sifferman]

lol No your not old. I always just say that. It is the military thing and from the country deal. Wasn't meaning anything by it! lol

[*RedStar*]

its a disease that runs in your family tree, if anyone you know is an addict you can bet your house that someone in his family was or is as well..

[Sistersteel]

its a disease that runs in your family tree, if anyone you know is an addict you can bet your house that someone in his family was or is as well..


Tru dat tru dat

[R.I.P.]

Sister and Siff you all are puppies. we talk a lot about young people coming into recovery in our area. it took me awhile but realized one day recently i WAS a younger person when i got in recovery, it's just that i have grown up now. i am older. hell i never even thought of my self as middle aged unti recently either.i still feel young. keep comin back you two, i need you.

[indianamonster1986]

For some it is because they where injured and where prescribed pain meds. Others it is to fit in. Some do it because they are bored....

[indianamonster1986]

Someone very close to me started on pain meds when they blew out their knee back in 79. Since then he has had 14 knee surgeries and knee replacement, torn rotatory cuff, heel spur, and recently had total bone reconstruction on their leg. Now he cannot got a day without taking at least 6 1000 vics.

[sifferman]

Pain Meds are the damn Devil. Diffently use with caution for injury use only or they will suck you in fast. I have seen it over and over with my friends.

[cobra]

Pain Meds are the damn Devil. Diffently use with caution for injury use only or they will suck you in fast. I have seen it over and over with my friends.

For sure man, I've had two relapses since I've been in recovery where I was workin a SHIT program and got hurt and the doc says "Want somethin for pain?" I knew the moment I said yes it was over, BOTH TIMES. The second time I knew GOIN TO THE HOSPITAL what I was gonna do. No doubt it's a disease. Lemme tell ya some funny shit though about how our mind works. When I relapsed on the pain meds- Like right when I got the script I ate like 5, you know controllin a little lol- and THEN the rest of the time was tryin to control it by takin them as perscribed 1-2 every 3-4 hrs, can't really remember, but I WAS CHEWIN EM UP! LOL, I was still goin to meetins and shit and still tryin to pray and would be like "Dear God, thanx for keepin me clean today, I know I shouldn't be chewin those pills and all so help me try not to do that..." SUCH DENIAL! LOL Well, that lasted about a week before the guilt and shame ate me alive and I got honest about it, luckily not stayin out real long or anything and it gettin bad. But anyway..

[R.I.P.]

For sure man, I've had two relapses since I've been in recovery where I was workin a SHIT program and got hurt and the doc says "Want somethin for pain?" I knew the moment I said yes it was over, BOTH TIMES. The second time I knew GOIN TO THE HOSPITAL what I was gonna do. No doubt it's a disease. Lemme tell ya some funny shit though about how our mind works. When I relapsed on the pain meds- Like right when I got the script I ate like 5, you know controllin a little lol- and THEN the rest of the time was tryin to control it by takin them as perscribed 1-2 every 3-4 hrs, can't really remember, but I WAS CHEWIN EM UP! LOL, I was still goin to meetins and shit and still tryin to pray and would be like "Dear God, thanx for keepin me clean today, I know I shouldn't be chewin those pills and all so help me try not to do that..." SUCH DENIAL! LOL Well, that lasted about a week before the guilt and shame ate me alive and I got honest about it, luckily not stayin out real long or anything and it gettin bad. But anyway..


one of my friends just the other week shared in a meeying that got prescibed some shit for her broken foot and within 3 days was like "i think i'll use these as precribed but i will snort them." that's when she realized it was time to throw them away.
Cobra, glad you made it back bro. this disease ain't nothing to play with for sure. i don't take this shit for granted. it took a friend of mine out after 20 years. took him 6 years to get 2 years clean again then he died from the damage he did when he was out. it's easier to stay here then to get back here.

[Sistersteel]

Someone very close to me started on pain meds when they blew out their knee back in 79. Since then he has had 14 knee surgeries and knee replacement, torn rotatory cuff, heel spur, and recently had total bone reconstruction on their leg. Now he cannot got a day without taking at least 6 1000 vics.

Holy fuck. Damn.



For sure man, I've had two relapses since I've been in recovery where I was workin a SHIT program and got hurt and the doc says "Want somethin for pain?" I knew the moment I said yes it was over, BOTH TIMES. The second time I knew GOIN TO THE HOSPITAL what I was gonna do. No doubt it's a disease. Lemme tell ya some funny shit though about how our mind works...."


Reminds me of this story...I was ten days clean, off heroin, living out of the back of my husband's truck...driving north across the East coast. I had gone through the worst of the withdrawals and the physical symptoms were finally subsiding...when I developed a horrible fever. An abscess I had lanced on my left arm days earlier was infected and the infection had spread all the way up my arm to my shoulder, with the flesh hardening up around a 1" deep crater that was left where the abscess was, after all the puss had been drained out of it. I get to the hospital and the doctor took one look at my arm and I was immediately rushed to emergency where they got me ready for surgery. As consolation for the horrible state I was in, the nurse comes up to me and says: "Don't worry dear. Doctor said to get you on a morphine drip. You'll be right as rain in no time sweetie."

Can you believe my fucking luck?

I was fucked all up in no time.


[quote=tim;460253]one of my friends just the other week shared in a meeying that got prescibed some shit for her broken foot and within 3 days was like "i think i'll use these as precribed but i will snort them." that's when she realized it was time to throw them away.

Omg LMFAO ain't that the truth..God these stories bring back memories..damn we pull some fucked up shit.


Cobra, glad you made it back bro. this disease ain't nothing to play with for sure. i don't take this shit for granted. it took a friend of mine out after 20 years. took him 6 years to get 2 years clean again then he died from the damage he did when he was out. it's easier to stay here then to get back here.

Amen to that. Your worst day sober is still far better than any day high.

[cobra]

Holy fuck. Damn.

[quote]

Reminds me of this story...I was ten days clean, off heroin, living out of the back of my husband's truck...driving north across the East coast. I had gone through the worst of the withdrawals and the physical symptoms were finally subsiding...when I developed a horrible fever. An abscess I had lanced on my left arm days earlier was infected and the infection had spread all the way up my arm to my shoulder, with the flesh hardening up around a 1" deep crater that was left where the abscess was, after all the puss had been drained out of it. I get to the hospital and the doctor took one look at my arm and I was immediately rushed to emergency where they got me ready for surgery. As consolation for the horrible state I was in, the nurse comes up to me and says: "Don't worry dear. Doctor said to get you on a morphine drip. You'll be right as rain in no time sweetie."

Can you believe my fucking luck?

I was fucked all up in no time.


Amen to that. Your worst day sober is still far better than any day high.

You knowthey say that, BUT, I've had times in recovery (of course prolly wasn't workin the best program) where I'd rather cut my fuckin wrist than go on. I mean seriously so depressed I couldn't get out of bed. That's just me though, sometimes I don't know if that phrase is so true.

[R.I.P.]

brother, i can say i felt that way many times. it's fucked up the way we treat ourselves sometimes.i am living proof.the steps help overcome alot of that crap. my sponsor told me last night that i am not doing that as much any more.i still do from time to time. that's that poor self image low self esteem shit . i am grateful i can id that stuff today. there was a time when everything was good, bad, and indifferent. be grateful you don't have to live that way today. we have a choice.

[Sistersteel]

You knowthey say that, BUT, I've had times in recovery (of course prolly wasn't workin the best program) where I'd rather cut my fuckin wrist than go on. I mean seriously so depressed I couldn't get out of bed. That's just me though, sometimes I don't know if that phrase is so true.

Those are very normal sentiments. They're called post acute withdrawal symptoms. The statement I made was not in reference to the phase where you are clawing at the walls and foaming at the mouth trying to kick a habit. I am talking about the state of mind you find yourself in after life takes on some kind of normalcy.

[cobra]

Those are very normal sentiments. They're called post acute withdrawal symptoms. The statement I made was not in reference to the phase where you are clawing at the walls and foaming at the mouth trying to kick a habit. I am talking about the state of mind you find yourself in after life takes on some kind of normalcy.

LOL ME TOO. I'm talkin 2 years clean, fuckin life dropkickin you in the face! I remember my fuckin dog got ran over, a friend (in the program) was killed, and then I got failed outta school for "cheating" all in a matter of weeks. Dude, everyday, I was waken up like FUCK THIS SHIT, and just growlin through. Anyway, regardless, life clean is better than life using, for sure. I'm just sayin, I've had bad days (weeks, months) in recovery that can compare to some of my worst usin, espically b/c there's no dope to cover up. MORAL OF THE STORY, don't use no matter what, like you guys know, b/c all the shitty stuff DOES pass.

[Sistersteel]

LOL ME TOO. I'm talkin 2 years clean, fuckin life dropkickin you in the face! I remember my fuckin dog got ran over, a friend (in the program) was killed, and then I got failed outta school for "cheating" all in a matter of weeks. Dude, everyday, I was waken up like FUCK THIS SHIT, and just growlin through. Anyway, regardless, life clean is better than life using, for sure. I'm just sayin, I've had bad days (weeks, months) in recovery that can compare to some of my worst usin, espically b/c there's no dope to cover up. MORAL OF THE STORY, don't use no matter what, like you guys know, b/c all the shitty stuff DOES pass.


I have many bad days, and some very fucked up days and believe me if anything even remotely compared to what it felt like being fucked up, I'd be 4 feet under already.

[cobra]

well, I guess everyones just different..I dunno

[Sistersteel]

All that matters is that we're both here, sharing, caring and workin it a day at a time.

SS

[cobra]

word.

[fitbody]

some of us are born genetically predisposed to it
I was and so was my brother who died in 1991 at 21 yrs old

[Klaus Urine]

some of us are born genetically predisposed to it
I was and so was my brother who died in 1991 at 21 yrs oldThat sucks.

[Ryan Wacht]

Welcome to www.mmomill.com (http://www.mmomill.com) US, October 30, 2009 - Wake up this morning only to find your Xbox Live account has been banned? That's probably because you had a modded console and were playing illegal, pirated copies of games. buy blade soul gold (http://www.mmomill.com/)We have taken action against a small percentage of consoles that have been modified to play pirated game discs," a Microsoft spokesperson told IGN. "In line with our commitment to combat piracy and support safer and more secure gameplay for the more than 20 million members of our Xbox LIVE community, we are suspending these modded consoles from Xbox LIVE." Continent of the Ninth Gold (http://www.mmomill.com/)Though Microsoft wouldn't confirm specifically when these bannings took place, a quick look over on its official forums suggest it's been going on over the course of this past week. Plenty of users have created threads on the technical feedback forum reporting of having their Xbox 360 console banned. Tera online Gold (http://www.mmomill.com/)Microsoft also added this is a standing policy and isn't tied to any specific time-frame. blade and soul gold (http://www.mmomill.com/)"All consumers should know that piracy is illegal and that modifying their Xbox 360 console to play pirated discs violates the Xbox LIVE terms of use, will void their warranty and result in a ban from Xbox LIVE," the spokesperson added. "The health of the video game business depends on customers paying for the genuine products and services they receive from manufacturers, retailers, and the third parties that support them." Blade Soul power leveling (http://www.mmomill.com/)Read more: www.mmomill.com (http://www.mmomill.com)

WTF..someone needs to send this ass a virus or two.:ban:

[Ryan Wacht]

There's no easy answer to this one - every individual is different - but there are some factors that are commonly associated with drug abuse.


There's a big difference between why a person may try drugs for the first time and why that same person may then keep on taking them - again and again. Many people may try illicit drugs once or twice just out of curiosity - and feel no compulsion to repeat the experience.



Similarly, many people drink alcohol occasionally and have no problem at all about it - they do not get worried if they don't have a drink. But some people do.


For many people, drugs (including alcohol) can seem to provide something that is missing from their life - these substances can make them feel 'better' - for a while anyway. This can take a lot of forms.
People may abuse drugs because:


http://www.recovery.org.uk/images/rd_star.gif They feel insecure about themselves . . . . . and the drug can provide self-confidence or assertiveness (often demonstrated as aggression).
http://www.recovery.org.uk/images/rd_star.gif They feel lonely or unloved . . . . . and the drug is a friend - a best friend.
http://www.recovery.org.uk/images/rd_star.gif They feel alienated, not a part of society . . . . . and the company of other drug users can provide a sense of belonging.
http://www.recovery.org.uk/images/rd_star.gif They feel angry or resentful - at family, partners, life, god . . . . . and getting stoned or drunk etc. can blot out these uncomfortable feelings.
http://www.recovery.org.uk/images/rd_star.gif They feel stressed or scared as a result of some life situation . . . . . and drugs or booze can seem to relieve this sort of anxiety.
http://www.recovery.org.uk/images/rd_star.gif They're unhappy with life in the home, job, school, neighborhood - whatever . . . . . and drugs provide a means of escape for a while - a way of living in a fantasy world that seems better than the real one.


These are just a few examples - each person will have their own reasons for abusing drugs or alcohol. The common basis to most of these is that drugs provide a means of escape from uncomfortable feelings. They appear to offer a sort of alternative world - where the user feels strong, powerful, relaxed, loved etc. - and his or her immediate environment appears safe and attractive. This fantasy offers pleasant feelings that are missing from the user's real life situation.

But a fantasy is just a dream. Reality keeps coming back. So a drug user must keep taking more and more drugs to try and keep the fantasy alive.

I believe that some people were addicts in past lives and thus carry their addictive tendencies into their current life because they failed to resolve them.

[exit2010]

To escape reality for a little while so you can have a mental break.