my fiance's ex partner has turned up wanting trouble

[Ironbrian82]

guys got a problem me and my ladys been together almost 8 years and and her ex partners back on the seen trying to get between us, my fiancé split 1 year before we got together with him, I ve got 2 good jobs, plus I know I would kick the fuck out of him, as ive boxed since I was 8, please be honest do I fight him which I think he wants because he knows ive got more to lose opinions plz

[supbro!]

Punch him in his fucking face.

[Ironbrian82]

Punch him in his fucking face.

if the police get involed, I don't want to be dragged though the courts, for months, and end up doing some jail time

[Poker face Ace]

Why doesn't she file a restraining order? Or you can call him up and say "I Iron Brian, will sever your mother f'n head off".. JK hehe

[HTW]

Is he coming around because him and your ol lady are friendly again? Or did he escape the mental hospital and come back for her?? If she doesn't want him around, then she needs to put on some woman pants and tell him to get lost .. But if he's coming around and your lady is saying their just "friends" , don't trust her and get rid of her now. You can't stop people that wanna cheat. And if your lady is messing with him, don't be mad at him , be mad at her.

[Ironbrian82]

Is he coming around because him and your ol lady are friendly again? Or did he escape the mental hospital and come back for her?? If she doesn't want him around, then she needs to put on some woman pants and tell him to get lost .. But if he's coming around and your lady is saying their just "friends" , don't trust her and get rid of her now. You can't stop people that wanna cheat. And if your lady is messing with him, don't be mad at him , be mad at her.

no she hates him, he beat her, and threw her down a stair case, but ive been told because hes done nothing wrong now the police cant do anything by law, if he does anything or I do anything then the police will be happy to arrest him, but they told me not to fight with him, so it looks like im being a pussy

[HTW]

Well if he's cruising your house, that's against the law. If he's waiting for her outside her work, can't do that. If he's contacting her through cell phone or email, then she needs to block him.. But if you believe cops will do nothing, go have a talk with him. If it turns violent, so be it.

[warthog]

Strange as it sounds and without meanining any disrespect,Ironbrian,you and me both k ow that some of these women almost behave as if they like being thrown down stairs.I have seen genuine guys so many times get depressed because the woman has gone back to the guy they had tuat used to beat them.So many times as bouncer I would try to save a girl who was taking a beating and she would turn on me and smash me with her heels in the back of the head. Its almost like a Mr and Mrs Smith situation with most of them.I hope yours isnt one of them.I have learnt now that women are not worth fighting over.She either wants you or him.Dont go to jail over it. Just my opinion

[bushmaster]

Strange as it sounds and without meanining any disrespect,Ironbrian,you and me both k ow that some of these women almost behave as if they like being thrown down stairs.I have seen genuine guys so many times get depressed because the woman has gone back to the guy they had tuat used to beat them.So many times as bouncer I would try to save a girl who was taking a beating and she would turn on me and smash me with her heels in the back of the head. Its almost like a Mr and Mrs Smith situation with most of them.I hope yours isnt one of them.I have learnt now that women are not worth fighting over.She either wants you or him.Dont go to jail over it. Just my opinion

Good advice.

[Hoss06]

Good advice.

X2. I've been to many, many DV calls...at the time she will press charges...gets to court and retracts all of her statements and they're back together....

[weezer]

You are getting some great opinions, use them. My two cents opinion is this; don't go to jail over something you're not sure of, you have 2 jobs you can lose, an record, and no disrespect but whose to say if you go in jail, he have access to everything you have on the outside.

[Curt James]

I'm so glad I'm single.

That said...

Who can get a restraining order?

You can ask for a restraining order if a person has abused you, and you are related or have a close relationship with that person. Close relationships include people who are dating or used to date; are married, divorced or separated; and registered domestic partners.

More @ http://fvlc.org/get-help/faq-restraining-orders/

[Curt James]

guys got a problem me and my ladys been together almost 8 years and and her ex partners back on the seen trying to get between us, my fiancé split 1 year before we got together with him, I ve got 2 good jobs, plus I know I would kick the fuck out of him, as ive boxed since I was 8, please be honest do I fight him which I think he wants because he knows ive got more to lose opinions plz

No, you do not fight him.

A fight is in an unavoidable situation or where you have no other options. This person is an unhappy POS. Let him be unhappy alone. There's no need to involve yourself with his unhappy existence.

[sassy69]

Nope. Restraining order. Prior to that, have her keep a journal of when he shows up where he shouldn't be to establish a history of intent. Time, date, place, situation. Photos w/ a timestamp on them if possible. If there are any police reports of previous incidents, get copies. Build your case so you can be ready if it truly is in the process of escalating to stalking and threatening. Boom! Restraining order.

And just for shits & grins, maybe get the fiancee in some self-defense classes. Never a bad thing.

[joe-ali]

If u want to fight, then bait him into throwing the first punch. It will be construed as self defense that way. In all honesty u need to check ur girl first. Make sure she really is being firm with this guy. Many people like to send mixed messages cause they enjoy the attention. If your positive she is on the level then u can go handle this like a man.