A Woman's Battle by Lisa Sutton

[TTTG]

This is an interesting article by trainer Lisa Sutton that I have posted on a few other forums and have seen posted as well....


On the way to the gym the other day, while stopped at a red light, I happened to see two teen-aged girls, probably no more than fourteen or fifteen, walking down the sidewalk - certainly not a sight that would ever command my attention beyond a passing glance if that. However, these two young girls captured my attention. They wore tight, sleeveless half shirts and shorts cut high onto their thighs.

Immediately, I noticed that both of them were rail thin. I was thunderstruck. I couldn't believe my eyes! From where I sat in my car, I could see their collarbones. Their arms and legs were so thin that their knee and elbow joints looked disproportionately large and out of place. I watched them pass by and as they continued down the sidewalk, I couldn't help but note their protruding shoulder blades.


A few weeks later, mental images of these two young girls re-emerged as I leafed through a Victoria's Secret catalogue and noticed all of the waif-like figures that filled its pages. On every single page were images of the most unhealthy, mousy-looking women that I'd ever seen in my entire life. If women are supposed to strive to look like the models in these catalogues, then we are all in really big trouble.

Is this really the personification of "attractive" or what women in this society think that they are supposed to emulate to be desirable? As opposed to confident, self-assured young women, these women appear weak and sickly.

In my opinion, they look like victims, subject to anyone's whim. It's disgusting. So, what happens? Teenage girls are inundated with these images of what the media considers "attractive" and end up looking like they just stepped out of the cemetery. Personally, I think that it's absolutely criminal.

Intent upon understanding this mindset from the inside, I asked one of my training clients who once admitted that she struggles with her own body image. To give you some perspective, this woman is young, early twenties, attractive, and very, very, thin. Recently, she renounced her obsession with the scale and decided that she wanted to train with weights so she hired me and together, we began the journey toward physical fitness and self-awareness.

Through the course of our conversation, I learned that many of her contemporaries refused to lift weights as they were utterly convinced that lifting weights would give them bulging muscles and make them "look like men." She explained that her decision to weight train met with some stiff resistance from her comrades. Apparently, to these women, an increase in muscularity is synonymous with relinquishing their "femininity."

For these women, weight lifting and increasing in muscularity conjures unfavorable images of Amazon women from ancient cultures. According to myth, the Amazons were female warriors that fought in battle right alongside the men and were the complete antithesis of everything that this society considers "female." In fact, the very word, "Amazon" literally means "without breast."


Which makes sense considering that to facilitate the efficient use of a bow and arrow, legend has it that upon the birth of a female infant, the Amazons would sear one breast so that it would not develop. Consequently, the mere mention of the word "weight lifting," to most women brings to the forefront mental pictures of humongous, breast-less, likely unattractive, physically imposing women.

So, on one end of the continuum lie images of massive female warriors which society condemns and on the other end, lie images of wafer-thin models which society considers feminine and attractive. Given many women's association of increased muscularity with Amazonian-type, "manly" physiques, its not at all surprising that young girls strive to become paper thin thus "feminine" which results in malnourished, underdeveloped teen-aged girls that remain little better than one meal away from their coffins. Outright criminal.

Every time that I train a woman, I am fighting against the images of what this society considers "attractive" and "desirable." With every single repetition, my female clients are waging a battle within. On the one hand, they want to be healthy and physically fit but on the other hand, they are deathly afraid that lifting weights and increasing muscularity will make them look too "masculine" thus undesirable.

I have one question. Since when did men obtain a monopoly on muscularity? When did it come about that muscular men are attractive and muscular women are amazons? What is to be gained by keeping women from developing their physiques to their maximum genetic capabilities?

What I have noticed is that when women weight train and begin to fill out their own physical frames, they begin an inner transformation. These women experience an increased sense of self-esteem, a more positive self-image, and become much more self-assured. Women, who previously apologized for their very existence by walking with their heads down and shoulders slumped, walk a little bit taller and exude a bit more self-confidence.


Instead of attempting to erase their own existence with a wafer-thin appearance, women that strive toward fitness by developing their physiques and increasing their strength command power through their very presence. Are these "amazon-like," "masculine," thus undesirable attributes? Well, I suppose that it depends upon whom you ask.


Conclusion


To those that find themselves threatened by a self-assured woman, strength and muscularity are undesirable; i.e. "amazon-like." But, for those that are internally secure - a woman that commits to developing her muscles and increasing her strength; are the pinnacle of attractive and does not rival a woman's "femininity."

For my money; strength, muscular development and femininity are not inversely related. On the contrary, increased strength and muscularity are the cornerstones upon which to build an unwavering self-image and an unforgiving sense of self-confidence.

If you are a woman that battles with self-image ask yourself this, do you want the power to define your own self and what is considered feminine, attractive and desirable or are you willing to merely accept what the media shoves down your throat.

Women need to reclaim the power to define what is feminine, attractive and desirable. Take control and define your own self. At the end of the day, the choice remains entirely yours.

[sassy69]

Every girl I see join a gym and actually "get it" (vs just slapping around on the pink weights w/ the deer in headlights look) achieves that sense of self-empowerment. I think there's something huge to not just seeing the results, but realizing that you have learned how to manage your weight and CAN make any change you want in your physique. I think there's also empowerment in realizing that you CAN do those things that women traditionally have been told or had it implied that they shouldn't or can't do. The silly part is that there's never a clear and valid reason WHY they shouldn't or can't do this or that, but they're constantly given the message. The discovery that you CAN do it makes you completely forget all those messages and focus on pursuing this discovery.

[stephaniewicked]

I saw this essay in a few different places today and most definitely related.

"increased strength and muscularity are the cornerstones upon which to build an unwavering self-image and an unforgiving sense of self-confidence."

That line alone speaks volumes to me.

As Sassy said, learning that you CAN take control of these variables and CAN understand how the pieces of the puzzle fit together to yield the desired results is an incredible feeling.

[MacFlashGordon]

I'm heading an a tangent here but forgive me for doing so.
Interestingly enough I've been 'noting' the users at the gym when I go there and have felt that a distinct change has occurred (locally at least) in recent times.
Let me explain: I had the idea that western society if you like had moved on. That women were no longer so persecuted for being in a gym and that Hollywood Imagery was being gradually replaced by a hopeful reality that women are happy to carry muscle in the same way as men and that society was cool with that - even perhaps encouraged it as a beneficial. I'm pretty sure the number of female gym goers and those shoving more than just a handbag around whilst in the gym had increased - at least i thought that 5 years ago..
So, why is it that the number of females seems to be diminishing and spotting a healthy shaped or muscled woman is a rare event? Seems to me that we are developing a society of non functional people in the west. I sit this next to the knowledge that a lot of the guys in the gym are building 'beach' physiques - i.e. Functionally useless and for image purposes only.
For either sex empowerment is a positive thing. Like you TTTG I despair at the number of young girls who trade their often well conditioned physical 'makeup' for an unhealthy image - backed up in many cases by poor lifestyle choices.
A lot of guys on the other hand do the opposite - in the hope that they too will be more 'appealing' if they are build like brick shit houses.
Imagery has a lot to answer for in the larger scheme of things and ironically enough it seems that young males are under societal pressure to look like the image that is seen as being desirable more so than females. Am I wrong? This forum is of course biased by its collective view and that has to be remembered. The 'Goth and alcoholics youth are cool forum' will have a different perspective - probably deeper and more intelligent of course....I'm off to work on my guns. Got a beach to go to at the weekend.

[tight booty]

Great post TTTG! I never knew that amazon meant 'without breast'. I have always thought that amazon women were beautiful, strong and equal to men!

[sassy69]

I'm heading an a tangent here but forgive me for doing so.
Interestingly enough I've been 'noting' the users at the gym when I go there and have felt that a distinct change has occurred (locally at least) in recent times.
Let me explain: I had the idea that western society if you like had moved on. That women were no longer so persecuted for being in a gym and that Hollywood Imagery was being gradually replaced by a hopeful reality that women are happy to carry muscle in the same way as men and that society was cool with that - even perhaps encouraged it as a beneficial. I'm pretty sure the number of female gym goers and those shoving more than just a handbag around whilst in the gym had increased - at least i thought that 5 years ago..
So, why is it that the number of females seems to be diminishing and spotting a healthy shaped or muscled woman is a rare event? Seems to me that we are developing a society of non functional people in the west. I sit this next to the knowledge that a lot of the guys in the gym are building 'beach' physiques - i.e. Functionally useless and for image purposes only.
For either sex empowerment is a positive thing. Like you TTTG I despair at the number of young girls who trade their often well conditioned physical 'makeup' for an unhealthy image - backed up in many cases by poor lifestyle choices.
A lot of guys on the other hand do the opposite - in the hope that they too will be more 'appealing' if they are build like brick shit houses.
Imagery has a lot to answer for in the larger scheme of things and ironically enough it seems that young males are under societal pressure to look like the image that is seen as being desirable more so than females. Am I wrong? This forum is of course biased by its collective view and that has to be remembered. The 'Goth and alcoholics youth are cool forum' will have a different perspective - probably deeper and more intelligent of course....I'm off to work on my guns. Got a beach to go to at the weekend.

People usually start w/ an image they like or see that other people fine appealing. But they don't always know how to approach it. This is the "I know how to..." aspect that I have personally found very empowering. Nutrition & metabolism aren't rocket science, but they aren't intuitively obvious either. So if you don't know the "how to", then you start w/ the most obvious, i.e. starve yourself, or fall to the next obvious - what people tell you works (marketers for whatever miracle fat-loss product , propram, diet). Then when neither of those work, you end up as what you perceive as a "failure", and often fatter than you started. Or you starve yourself end up & nice and anorexic. Both are extremes of not understanding "How". If you can get someone to stick to a diet & training consistently for 3 weeks, then they actually start seeing results and feeling better, and can measure progress in terms of weights lifted, etc. THAT"S where you start feelign like you can actually do this & it works.

[TTTG]

"increased strength and muscularity are the cornerstones upon which to build an unwavering self-image and an unforgiving sense of self-confidence."

That line alone speaks volumes to me.

As Sassy said, learning that you CAN take control of these variables and CAN understand how the pieces of the puzzle fit together to yield the desired results is an incredible feeling.

Yes, this is a rather powerful line in that article. I think some who observe anyone making a choice to add muscle to their frame will at times take a very narrow minded view as to why they are doing that. In times past women that were strong and even visibly muscular were considered a prize. Many women of the past were involved with taking care of farm animals, collecting wood, building and doing repairs, defending the family and many of the same things the men were doing. Being strong and even muscular for some was a requirement for survival in many lands. Our bodies ( men and women included ) were not meant to be idle so that our muscle withers away. We were meant to move, lift, carry, fight and build muscle on our frame and when we do we do not just change our look but we function better both physically and mentally.

So we need to realize that many women that desire to gain muscle are not doing it for reasons such as... "They want to look like a man" or "They want to be a freak" or some of the other narrow minded comments you hear at times. Many women understand that getting physically strong will improve the quality of many aspects of their life.

[Ibarramedia]

Great post TTTG! I never knew that amazon meant 'without breast'. I have always thought that amazon women were beautiful, strong and equal to men!

tb the Amazons of Greek mythology cut off their right breast to make it easier for them to sling a bow without worrying about the breast being in the way.

[stephaniewicked]

Many women understand that getting physically strong will improve the quality of many aspects of their life.

That, it certainly does...

[tight booty]

tb the Amazons of Greek mythology cut off their right breast to make it easier for them to sling a bow without worrying about the breast being in the way.

That's so interesting....they were true warriors, that's for sure!

[MacFlashGordon]

People usually start w/ an image they like or see that other people fine appealing. But they don't always know how to approach it. This is the "I know how to..." aspect that I have personally found very empowering. Nutrition & metabolism aren't rocket science, but they aren't intuitively obvious either. So if you don't know the "how to", then you start w/ the most obvious, i.e. starve yourself, or fall to the next obvious - what people tell you works (marketers for whatever miracle fat-loss product , propram, diet). Then when neither of those work, you end up as what you perceive as a "failure", and often fatter than you started. Or you starve yourself end up & nice and anorexic. Both are extremes of not understanding "How". If you can get someone to stick to a diet & training consistently for 3 weeks, then they actually start seeing results and feeling better, and can measure progress in terms of weights lifted, etc. THAT"S where you start feelign like you can actually do this & it works.

I get that Sassy. No doubt what you say - just don't 'get' the poor lifestyle 'thing' though. Maybe it just boils down to personal choice? Perhaps we have to recall our own youth. I certainly didn't live a puritan lifestyle as a young man! I am partially at least a hypocrite (damn it!) Cheers.

[LisaRD23]

I've come across this article before and just love it. It is a battle sometimes just trying to explain to the "ignorant" that women with muscle aren't any less feminine than your "Victoria Secret Girls", if anything I belive we are more feminine.

Our bodies are more curvy, leaner, we work hard to improve our physical appearance and we have a inner strength and discipline that these girls could just never understand.

[pict]

I believe that to at least some degree, the social “norm” of weak women has its origins in ancient religious/political power struggles and persists today in part as a relic of the biases fostered during those struggles. (Though no doubt there are some today who encourage the notion of women as weak either out of fear of losing power or as a demonstration of authority/power over others (kind of like rape).)
At the time of the Roman occupation of Britain, the native people of Scotland were known as Picts. The Picts were a pagan matrilineal society (determining familial descent from the mother rather than from the father) whose women fought as warriors alongside the men and who (I believe) worshiped goddesses (and perhaps gods as well). As Christians tried to spread their religion (the worship of an all-powerful male god) to the resistant Picts, and as political power became increasingly linked to the organized Christian church, the Christian missionaries were able to succeed only to the degree that they were able to destroy or compromise the ancient Pictish traditions and persuade the Pictish royalty. Christian churches were built on top of pagan holy sites. Pictish rulers (promised invincibility if converting to Christianity) accepted the influence of the new Father Worship religion and, (in about 700 AD, when many of the Pictish people were still goddess worshipers) enacted the “Law of Innocents,” which prohibited Pictish women (for the first time ever) from fighting in battle. Less than 150 years later, the still matrilineal Picts and the patrilineal Scots united and became a single, patrilineal society.
I do not have a doctorate in history, or religion, or anything for that matter. But my reading and analysis has convinced me that the marginalization of female power in society was at least a result of Christianity’s victory over paganism and may have been a necessary precondition for that victory.

[McLaug]

One finds herself in a gym, lifts weights, gets along and...receives Attention (equals Warmth)
The other one gets wrapped in a tablecloth, gets dragged down a catwalk and some punters clap while their obese women in the audience are jealous and in awe.
This strange situation too equals Attention (Warmth) for the young female.

And that is the whole point (IMHO). Young persons look for role models. Role models who make sure that they themselves (the youngsters) will receive a bit of the Attention (Warmth) that the role Model receives from all the countless admirers.

One of the reasons why is: Most of the parents do NOT succeed to become their children's role-model or don't even want to be...or better not be.They're not able to pay attantion to their kids and give them the Love they need. I don't want to beat on
the parents here, 'cause they probably only "teach what the have learned."

***

Okay, is everyone sleeping now ? (I hear snoring near the stage...
No, ok then...

***

I am afraid that for those young people there is no big difference in the two concepts
of being a strong amazon or a weak looking scarecrow as long as the result is what
they (think) they need.